Britney Spears

T’was the night before Christmas, and all through LA
Every creature was blurring the words that they say;
The stockings were pleather and the cleavage was bare,
In hopes that Robert Pattinson might just be there.
The girls were all decked out and far from their beds,
Ativan-induced visions bounce ‘round in their heads
Of a chain-smoking Britney, with a babe on her lap,
And Leo settling down for a much-needed nightcap.
Angie’s too thin now and Jessica’s fatter,
Winona’s stealing wine glasses, but what does it matter? read more...

A manifesto dedicated to releasing the reluctant bisexual.
by Radcliffe U. Hall

Angelina Jolie, Pink and the chick that played Marcia Brady. All of these women have something in common. They are all non-practicing bisexuals. Or, more specifically, they are retired. I know people believe that sexuality is “fluid” but you have to draw the line somewhere, like how would you react if Charo said she was a non-practicing Mexican? When a sexy girl announces that she is a bisexual but then fails to show adequate proof, it is like dangling a sexy cookie in the face of all lesbians. read more...