THURSDAY MARCH 15

10pm. Jeudi on the Rocks @ Salon Officiel, 351 Roy Est. Another edition of Salon Officiel Thursdays, featuring resident DJ Pat Dynamite, and special guest DJ We Are Ortiz aka We are Wolves/ Claass. Hosted by DJ Jones. No cover.

FRIDAY MARCH 16

9pm. Midnight Poutine Presents: Reversing Falls + Honheehonhee + C T Z N S H P @ Jackie & Judy | Rococo Bar Spectacle, 6512, avenue du Parc. Montreal music blog Midnight Poutine jumps off the web and into your hearts with this, their first live concert series. Featuring performances by Reversing Falls, Honheehonhee and C T Z N S H P. Tickets $10, available at the door only.

SATURDAY MARCH 17

St Patrick’s Day @ Various Locations. Hoo Boy! St Paddy’s falls on a Saturday this year, so prepare yo’self for uber-packed Irish pubs and lots o’ green beer-induced barf on the street. If you’re brave enough to face the hoards, head to Ye Olde Orchard (three Montreal locations at 20 Prince Arthur West, 1189 de la Montaigne & 5563 Monkland), or Hurley’s (1225 Crescent).

Holiday devoted to snake-hating saints not your thing? If you live in the McGill Ghetto, Plateau or Downtown near ConU you may as well go out: you won’t be getting any sleep anyhow with all the loud and drunken wannabe-leprechauns roving the streets.

7pm. PINGPOCALYPSE! @ TBA. The world was to end, how would you spend your final moments? If you answered, “play Ping Pong!” then have got the event for you!

This weekend, Ping Posh presents PINGPOCALYPSE, a chance to play Ping Pong as if the apocalypse was nigh! Join them for an evening of revelry with drinks, music, prizes and plenty o’ Ping Pong, all for a great cause. The all-inclusive fee of $45 includes unlimited drinks, snacks, prizes, and lots of Ping Pong playing! All profits will go to purchase bi-weekly fresh local vegetable baskets for low-income families at La Petite Maison de la Miséricorde. Additional donations welcome.

All levels of player are welcome and games will be friendly, however, proper attire is mandatory. Official Ping Posh by-laws require that all players wear white sporting apparel while on the court and formal wear (“fancy dress”) following elimination from tournament play. This year, in honour of St. Patrick’s Day, a special “whites exemption” will be made for those who decide to sport green on the court. There will be prizes for particularly inspired ensembles. Doors open at 6pm and Tournament play starts at 7pm sharp. Tickets $45, advance registration is required.

7:30pm & 9:30pm. Cabane à sucre PORK CLUB @ Dépanneur Le Pick-Up, 7032 Rue Waverly. Going to the cabane is pretty much my favourite activity, but since I am sans car it’s tricky getting out to the maple-pork bounties promised by the Quebec countryside. Luckily, Le Pick-Up’s Szef Bartek will prepare 5 pork courses soaked in maple syrup for us city folk, all for the low price of $35! There will be two seatings at 7:30pm and 9:30pm. Reservations required. Write to lepickupevents@gmail.com. Spaces are limited!

8:30pm. Pat Jordache @ Sala Rossa, 4848 St-Laurent. Pat Jordache does his namesake proud at this St Paddy’s Day concert at Sala Rossa. $15.

SUNDAY MARCH 18

12pm. Montreal St Patrick’s Day Parade @ along Ste Catherine between Fort and Philip’s Square. The longest running of its kind in Canada, the 188th consecutive Montreal St. Patrick’s Parade has been going strong since 1824. Plenty of family-friendly fun: think marching bands, floats and cute babies & dogs dressed in green. Pray for sun!