Flirt, smooch, spank: it’s springtime. We’re frisky.
Fifty Shades of Grey, the electrifying romance that the ENTIRE world fell for (ahem, $500m at the box office), will be released digitally as of May 1st, and available on Blue-Ray & DVD as of May 8th. You know you wanna.
In anticipation, we’ve done three important things:
1. Launched a contest on Twitter.
Tweet, “YES, yes, yes @Shedoesthecity, I want my springtime to include #FiftyShades and then some.”
2. Dusted off our leather crop.
3. Compiled a GIANT list of 50 date ideas in Toronto. (Gurl, get busy.)
50 date ideas in Toronto this Spring: Which ones makes your top five?
1. Meet for a drink at The Park Hyatt Roof Bar. But pretend you’re meeting for the first time. (Wear a hat and the role playing will come easier.)
2. Long bike ride down the Leslie Street Spit. Then find a secret place to exchange your own spit.
3. Grab a coffee, a newspaper, and a blanket to spend a lazy weekend morning reading and rolling on top of each other in Alexandra Muir Gardens.
4. Morning sex followed by a trip to St. Lawrence Market. (Have you ever had a peameal bacon sandwich after sex? Most satisfying.)
5. Pretend it’s 1998 and head to Suspect Video to pick out an erotic film to rent. (Both of you choose one and surprise the other.)
6. Head to The Big Chill for ice cream, and then stroll south to Kensington and find funny vintage outfits to try on.
7. Meet each other at the Fairmont Royal York Library Bar, but no underwear allowed.
8. Hold hands and say hi to the yak at High Park zoo. Then hike into the woods and do things.
9. Oysters at Oyster Boy while writing your sex to-do list for this summer.
10. Take a ferry to Centre Island. Buy a ticket for the scrambler and whip out your tit. (Disclaimer: Not our fault if you get caught and are asked to leave.)
11. Wander Rosedale one warm evening and each pick out your pretend dream home. Then go home and please each other orally.
12. Meet for a swim at Sunnyside Pavillion. Afterwords, get popsicles and watch each other lick.
13. Make out in a Beck Taxi.
14. Grab sandwiches at Pusateri’s on Bay Street, and picnic in Philosopher’s Walk.
15. Pretend you’re art thieves and sleuth around the AGO.
16. Spend an afternoon sitting across from each other at your local Toronto Public Library. You’re allowed to read, stare, and play footsie. But that’s it.
17. Hit Evergreen Brickworks on Saturday morning for their Farmers’ Market and say nice things to each other.
19. End your work week with Friday Night Live at The ROM. Dare to dance with the dinos.
20. Put some coins in the jukebox at The Communist’s Daughter and see if you can guess each other’s songs.
21. Play dress-up at Harry Rosen.
22. Go see a bluegrass band at The Dakota Tavern and be sure to do lots of ass touching while you dance.
23. Grab a burger at Vesta Lunch and then dart next door to get a palm reading.
24. Bike all the way to The Beach. Once you’re there, see if you can taste sweaty salt on each other. Or don’t.
25. Take a wander through Come As You Are and talk about which toy speaks to you.
26. Go naked swimming at Oasis Aqualounge. (If you’re into it.)
27. Splurge on the squid ink risotto at Joso’s on Davenport.
28. Slurp soup together at King’s Noodle Restaurant in Chinatown.
29. You don’t need a child to enjoy Ripley’s Aquarium.
30. Hit the Cheese Boutique and work together to create your dream cheese plate.
31. If you prefer sweet to savoury, go to Soma Chocolate on King West and feed each other.
32. See just how much you can do in the time that your car takes to get washed at The Queensway Car Wash drive-thru. Following, head to Tom’s Dairy Freeze for a milkshake.
33. Bi-bim-bop in Koreatown and then get a private booth at XO Karaoke.
34. Lie in the middle of the field at UofT’s King’s College Circle. Look up at the stars and pretend you’re a young couple in a movie. (BE VERY DRAMATIC.)
35. Water taxi —> Ward’s Island.
36. Couples massage at Hammam Spa.
37. Sign up for a cooking class at Summerhill LCBO. Following, get drunk.
38. Tea and boardgames all night long at Snakes & Lattes.
39. Make a date to attend the next Toronto Flower Market. P-r-e-t-t-y.
40. Ten more, can we do this? YES. Cocktails in the Shangri-La lobby because hotels exude SEX.
41. Whisky at The Horseshoe Tavern to check out a band you’ve never heard of.
42. Get tix to see a play at The Tarragon Theatre, then go for a walk to buy a late night frozen treat from The Food Depot on Dupont. (There’s a sneaky little park behind the Toronto Hydro Substation off of Poplar Plains. A choice spot for naughtiness.)
43. Whisper your fantasies into his/her ear while in The Bat Cave at the ROM.
44. Walk Mount Pleasant Cemetery and cite love poetry from history.
45. Play games at Toronto’s Maserati dealership.
46. Wear your finest lingerie to a concert at The Royal Conservatory.
47. Spank each other in The Trump Hotel elevator.
48. Meet for cinnabons at Eglinton Station, and then go to Indigo to gaze at magazines. (Wash your hands first.)
49. Porchetta sannies in Trinity Bellwoods, and then admire the character of dogs in the giant dog bowl.
50. Nix this entire list and stay home to watch a movie. May we suggest Fifty Shades of Grey?