We are excited to introduce a sexy new monthly column in which a Toronto couple explores the benefits and pleasures inside the city’s top luxury hotels. From testing out the Egyptian cotton on king size beds to rating washroom soap, Lacey and Jerome will give you a very intimate look into their DO NOT DISTURB rooms away from home.

You see, Jerome has severe allergies to cats, and Lacey has two: Fancy and Puff. And although she is more than happy to shack up at Jerome’s for the night, he has two roommates and thin walls. This couple needed an allergen free locked room to make some noise. As always, we are here to help.

For the month of February, the daring duo hit up The Park Hyatt for their special offer Romance At The Park. With a wheeling suitcase full of tricks, they settled in for a night of ravenous you-know-what. Here they share the naughty details.

Jerome and I were so excited for our night at The Park Hyatt. We were really just craving privacy, time and, well, hotel beds are always better. Don’t you think?

A day prior to our steamy staycation, Jerome hinted to me that he had lots of surprises up his sleeve and cautioned me in a teasing tone, “You are in so much trouble.”
Oooh, I love it when he says that, but competitive by nature, I needed my own set of secret tricks. I tossed in two vibrators, one being that trendy WeVibe for couples, and packed a saucy little outfit: thigh-high stockings, see-through tank with garter clips, fishnet thong and 4-inch pumps. Now, this might seem like overkill, but it was nothing compared to what he had in his dirty little tote. This is what my dear Jerome arrived with:

– black velvet blindfold
– massage oil
– erotic bath oil
– love cuffs
– riding crop (somewhat alarming but classy by design)

You could say we were a wee bit enthusiastic. But that’s not where the fun stopped! We made dinner reservations at Le Paradis, intended to hit the cinema for a late night film and discussed capping the night by role-playing in the Hyatt roof bar; strangers meeting for the first time. I was going to be a fiery advertising exec from NYC and he was going to be a filthy-minded film director from Copenhagen. We talked about the plan to such an extent that it was practically scripted.

I’d love to tell you that we used all of our apparatus over the course of the evening but instead we made a little love nest under the covers and just smooched, screwed and came up for air to talk about things like Netflix and airport security. In between exertions, we stopped for sips of sparkling wine and nibbled on the strawberries and grapes that were all kindly waiting for us upon arrival. (THAT COMES WITH THE PACKAGE!!) We laughed at our overzealous drive to incorporate absolutely everything and wondered what the concierge would think if our luggage accidentally spilled open in the lobby.

Beyond the gorgeous south-facing view, wall-to-wall mirrored bathroom (oooh, fun!) and amazingly comfy bed, Jerome was most impressed by the toiletries on offer at The Hyatt, “Did you know they have Le Labo soap? I’m going to pinch these.” 

“Do it!!” I cried from the bedroom, lying naked rubbing my legs around the pristine white sheets. Well, pristine upon arrival. 

It was a fantastically romantic evening and The Hyatt’s location is perfect for little outings in the Yorkville neighbourhood. We even made a pit-stop to Whole Foods for bottles of sparkling Kombucha tea. (Hey, we needed energy for our night of sweaty endurance.)

No, we didn’t incorporate our fun novelty gizmos into acrobatic positions and complicated sexual theatrics. No blindfold, no vibrators, no cuffs…but that’s okay, it was perfect. A true retreat from every day life, high in the sky and completely ours for a night. And with a 2pm checkout time as part of the Romance package, we were able to wake up and do it all over again.

Mmmmm. The sky looked so beautiful when we left the hotel. If I hadn’t had to make a meeting that aft, I would have sworn I was actually on vacation. In Vienna. Or maybe Chicago. No, Madrid! Or maybe just HOTSEXCITY. It felt good. We felt gooooood. 

Jerome and I are thrilled to be doing this column with Shedoesthecity and now know for next time that although we like to share our toys, we don’t need to pack all of them at once. That said, it was amusing and arousing to play show and tell.

Lacey and Jerome

Does Romance at the Park sound like your idea of fun? How can it not? Reserve a night now.