Candid advice from relationship columnist, Jen Kirsch. This week she gives tips on how to find time for dating within a hectic work schedule.

Dear Jen Kirsch,
I really want to date more in 2013 but my job is so demanding that I feel like I never have any time and am completely fried come Friday. How do I do this???

Too busy for love


Dear Too busy for love,

Dating when you have a demanding and busy schedule is definitely a challenge, but if at the end of the day you want a relationship, it’s definitely a challenge worth taking on, non?  If that’s the case then it’s important to make it a priority, the same way you do for other elements of your life, such as work.   

Some suggestions:

Say yes to networking events. For those of us who are work-ridden, attending networking events is like hitting two birds with one stone.  Not only do you have the opportunity to meet others in your field (something that can help you grow), but also you have the chance to meet a likeminded mate. These events are typically held right after work, so you don’t need to take extra time to go home and get changed.  Plus the usually available open bar can help loosen you up a little if need be.  Just be sure to stick to a two drink maximum to avoid embarrassment.

Take the show on the road. If your job necessitates working after hours and bringing your work home with you, instead of going straight home, why not work from a local café?  Not only will the change of scenery help you unwind, but the law of proximity will likely have you seeing the same people over and over again, giving you the opportunity to build new relationships outside the office. Tip: Don’t hide out in the corner and instead sit near the door.  You want to be approachable and this is the perfect location for eye contact.

Start online dating. Say what you will about online dating, but if you don’t have the time (or interest) to go out come the end of the work week, this forum can allow you to find a potential partner while remaining pyjama-clad from the confines of your own home.  Sign up for an online dating site that comes with a fee: this will act  as a motivator for you to take it seriously. Many people who take the online dating route, like you, have demanding schedules, which is why they resort to this method—so already you’re starting off with a similarity.  Upload three various images, answer the questions seriously, and be sure to make checking your inbox and reaching out to others part of your evening routine.
Contrary to whatever you’re telling yourself, it is absolutely possible to find a mate, whether you’re a workaholic or not.  The trick is to treat finding one like a job in and of itself.

Jen Kirsch