Toronto Hit List: That Time of the Month, (ALT)Night – Friday the 13th, Wannabe Spice Girls Tribute, A Beyoncé Baby Shower & more!

WEDNESDAY 

10 pm HumbleMania 34 @ The Ossington, 61 Ossington Ave. Special acoustic performance by John Wilkes Booth and the debut of The Love Machine session of Live in Bellwoods. Vinyl dance party afterwards!

THURSDAY

10 pm Boobie Party @ Margret, 2952 Dundas St. W. DJ Fawn Big Canoe plays everything ever written (and more) on the turntables and wants you there to make horrible requests!

10 pm Met You On Livejournal @ The Shop under Parts & Labour, 1566 Queen St. W. A nostalgic night of emo, screamo and pop punk music, played by killing_girls, hardcoresnaps, and timmcready + live set by emo cover band DEAR DIARY.

FRIDAY

6 pm “After The End” Opening @ O’Born Contemporary, 131 Ossington Ave. “’The 2012 Phenomenon’ comprises a number of belief systems that suggest that this year will be met with cataclysmic or transformative events that will bring about our final destiny. Twelve local emerging artists successfully answered our call to confront the environmenta…l, biological and psychological implications of a full doomsday. The combined result takes shape for After The End.” Until 9 pm.

8 pm The Wrecking Ball @ The Garrison, 1197 Dundas St. W. A quarterly, hybrid performance series that pairs heavy metal bands with readings by experimental poets. Heaviness by Battlesoul, Corpusse, and Into Exile. Language by: Liisa Ladouceur, Liz Worth, and Natalie Zina Walschots.

10 pm (ALT)Night – Friday the 13th @ Margret, 2952 Dundas St. W. Movies, Jason masks, black cats, CAMP CRYSTAL LAKE DANCE PARTY! DJ Dislexia brings you all the murderous favourites your gruesome ears can handle (indie-house-rock-disco-risco-party-jam-booty-punk-funky-weird-whatever). $2.50 PBRs from 8-10 pm, ’cause drunk feet dance better.

10 pm 90s Party @ The Annex WreckRoom, 794 Bloor St. W. Giveaways, 90’s prizes and movies, dance-off, Much Music Oh Henry Video Dance, spotlight slow dances, 1 am costume contest and more! Free before 11 pm, $5 after.

10 pm That Time Of The Month @ The Henhouse, 1532 Dundas St. W. DJs Alex Molotkow and Chandler Levack + special guest David Balzer bring you the most righteous soul, disco and R&B by the women that understand.

10 pm Fuck It @ Clinton’s, 693 Bloor St. W. A sweaty, dirty, guilty-pleasure-filled evening where the Bangs & Blush ladies play whatever the fuck they want! 80’s, 90’s and 2000’s… all the favourites of yours and theirs.

10 pm The Zodiacs Present: Return of the Capricorns @ The Shop under Parts & Labour, 1566 Queen St. W. Diego Bros spinning/jumping/dancing/singing to the best in 90’s hip-hop and R&B. $5.

10 pm A Soul @ Holy Oak, 1241 Bloor St. W. The music that makes you feel so, so good (old soul). Featuring performances by Maylee Todd, Matt McLaren, Jesse Levine, Christine Bougie, Blake Howard, and Jay Anderson + special guest singers Alex Lukashevsky, Thom Gill, Isla Craig, and Emilie Mover.

10 pm Funkin’ It Up @ No One Writes to the Colonel, 460 College St. All funk, all the time with DJs Skank Honto and Splattermonkey. Classic funk, nu-funk, ghetto funk, afro funk, funky hip-hop, funky breaks, etc.

10 pm Secret Models @ The Ossington, 61 Ossington Ave. One big room, full of bad bitches! DJs Secret Models play hits straight from your high school semi-formal.

10 pm Dirty Talk @ Unlovable, 1415-B Dundas St. W. The Adult Fantasy Adventure™ with DJs Diana, Pammm and Jaime Sin. Italo, disco house, indie dance and space shit.

10 pm Rich Aucoin @ The Drake Underground, 1150 Queen St. W. Record release show for Halifax’s Rich Aucoin + a performance by Sandman Viper Command. $10 tickets available at the Drake Hotel or online.

10 pm Her @ La Perla, 783 Queen St. W. New Years Res-HER-lution Edition! DJs Kris Steeves, John Caffery, The Robotic Kid, and OMGBLOG.com play motivational beats to keep HER on track all night.. Special drink special before 11:30 pm. For line bypass, email set.her.free@gmail.com. $5.

SATURDAY

8 pm Craftstock 4 @ Kapisanan Philippine Centre for Arts & Culture, 167 Augusta Ave. Indie pop + DIY craft fair! Featuring performances by The Elwins, Formalists, Wide Eyed Tour Guide, Union Duke, and Lum + craft vendors Shawnte Designs, Maton Design, Kimberly Dawkins, Peppermint Robot Surprise, Tomislava, Cookie Friday Co., and Cusscakes. $6.

8 pm DJ Skate Night @ The Harbourfront Centre, 235 Queen’s Quay W. DJs Arcee, Kaewonder and Serious bring their monthly vinyl podcast Cratery to life on ice with the winter edition of Skatery. Expect to hear a blend of genres all derived from funk. Until 11 pm.

9 pm All Girl Pillow Fight Revue Presents: Bashed @ Lee’s Palace, 529 Bloor St. W. A full night of fights, prizes and surprises – watch women prove their powerful pillow prowess on the mats! $15 advanced tickets available at Rotate This and Silver Snail, $20 at the door.

10 pm Wannabe Spice Girls Tribute @ El Mocambo, 464 Spadina Ave. Fifteen years after they swept the world, the Spice Girls are back (sort of). Live singing, live band, accents, choreography, and, most importantly, platforms! $15 in advance at Soundscapes, $17 at the door.

10 pm Laytheseknight @ The Red Light, 1185 Dundas St. W. DJs Famous Players and Patrick McGuire play 90’s R&B that eventually devolves into The-Dream and Waka Flocka.

10 pm Lucky Bitches @ The Ossington, 61 Ossington Ave. Two ice stallions serve it up hot with a glamour positive party for anyone who knows what it’s like to be a lucky bitch. The guiltiest of pleasures all night: hitz that span the ages, 90’s hip-hop, contemporary hitz, 80’s velvet jamz, forgotten gemz.

10 pm I Know You Care @ Crawford, 718 College St. Hip-hop, reggae, funk and soul upstairs with DJs Mickey D, James Redi and Shan Dub. Ol’hip-hop, Miami bass and booty downstairs with DJs Le Filth and Boots Boogie. $5 before 11:30 pm, $10 after.

10 pm Shake, Rattle & Roll @ Clinton’s, 693 Bloor St. W. Spend the night together with the Bangs & Blush ladies! 60’s pop, soul and rock n’ roll to drink, dance and get messy to. $5.

10 pm A Beyoncé Baby Shower @ WAYLA, 996 Queen St. E. A baby shower for Mommy-B! DJ Alessandro plays the best in pop, top 40 and club anthems while mixing in your favourite hits, remixes, album tracks and b-sides from and featuring Ms. Knowles. $5.

10 pm Bitch Craft @ The Shop under Parts & Labour, 1566 Queen St. W. DJs Blonde and Redhead play LOUD RAP MUSIC. Free before 11 pm, $5 after.

10 pm Rap Jams @ Margret, 2952 Dundas St. W. DJ Steve Rock plays old and new rap all night long.

10 pm Saigon Nights @ Holy Oak, 1241 Bloor St. W. DJ Superkid plays indie electro, 80’s remixes, and 50’s/60’s Vietnam tracks while Paul G plays international dance music (M83, The Knife, LCD Soundsystem, Cut Copy and more). Prizes! PWYC.

10 pm Business Woman’s Special @ Augusta House, 152-A Augusta Ave. Resident DJs Sammy and Nino Brown spin alongside AJ, who is making his BWS debut. Kimon fulfills all your pink wallpaper photography desires. $5.

10 pm Goth Drag @ Beaver Café, 1192 Queen St. W. DJs Schramm and Murderess Margot play goth, death-rock, new wave, minimal synth and cold wave. Live projections and performance by Judy Virago. $5.

SUNDAY

12 pm Return To Your Roots Burlesque Brunch @ Cadillac Lounge, 1296 Queen St. W. Brunch, beer and boobs! Featuring performances by Fionna Flauntit, MsChaos Divine, Aviva the Mirage, Val Cano, Ava Noir, and the singing, stripping sensation Sassy Ray. Raffle, prizes and more. $10 (brunch not included).

~ Caitlyn Holroyd

(For event submissions, email caitlyn_holroyd@hotmail.com)

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