Toronto Hit List: The Quiet Storm, S.S. Songs: The Smiths, 90s Party: Back to Bayside, Queen West Art Crawl & more!

September 6th-16th Toronto International Film Festival @ various locations. Complete list of screenings and events online.

September 14th-16th Queen West Art Crawl @ Queen from Bathurst to Roncesvalles. Queen West Art Crawl celebrates and cultivate the unique character, diversity and ethos of Parkdale and Queen West – a natural habitat for individual artists, arts organizations, artist run centres and businesses that promote art and culture. 2012 marks the 10th anniversary of the festival.

September 15th-16th Roncesvalles Polish Festival @ Roncesvalles Village. Polish food, music, dancing, and fun in one of Toronto’s most vibrant communities. Beer gardens and food, food, food!

WEDNESDAY

8 pm Phedre with Beta Frontiers & Times Neue Roman @ The Drake Underground, 1150 Queen St. W.

Daps Records dives into the Underground and brings some of its finest for your aural pleasure. With Phedre, Beta Frontiers, and Times Neue Roman. $5.

9 pm “Out of the Box” Art Show & Fundraising Party @ The Henhouse, 1532 Dundas St. W. A series of nude and semi-nude portraits by Emily Lorimer and Suzanne Reesor. Photography exhibit, portrait booth, raffles with cool prizes, and a few more surprises! Dance party afterwards. (This is a special event dedicated to raising money for Josh, who is saving up for top surgery.) Until 11 pm.

9 pm Future Party @ The Hoxton, 69 Bathurst St. Featuring DJ Samantha Ronson and local talent Filthy Gorgeous, and Bangers & Mash. $90 tickets available online, with proceeds supporting a security planting for Kibbutz Nir Oz in the Negev Desert. Nir Oz is a Kibbutz community, with 350 residents, bordering Gaza that is exposed to frequent missile and artillery attacks. As a safety mechanism, JNF is planting trees surrounding the area to act as green buffers to protect the community members and its visitors.

10 pm HumbleMania 50 @ The Ossington, 61 Ossington Ave. The last HumbleMania ever! For its 50th (and last), HumbleMania will be throwing a semi-formal face paint party. Featuring a face painting station to satisfy your creative desires, performance by Nicholas Doubleyou & The B-Squad, and the debut of a brand new Live in Bellwoods from Meanwood. Vinyl dance party afterwards. PWYC.

THURSDAY

6 pm Paddle Royale for Big Brothers Big Sisters @ SPiN Toronto, 461 King St. W. Big Brothers Big Sisters of Toronto hosts a ping pong tournament with a dance party to boot! 64 teams battle it out in a round robin tournament to raise money for Big Brothers Big Sisters. Featuring prizes for the team with the best costumes, raffle, DJs, and a glow-in-the-dark party with glowing cocktails and snacks. Pre-drink and team registration from 6 to 7:30 pm; tournamenet from 7:30 to 11 pm, and afterparty from 11 pm to 1 am. $40 tickets available online (includes some snacks, a free drink ticket, and a tax receipt).

6 pm The Dodger @ Steam Whistle Brewery, 255 Bremner Blvd. Toronto’s premier charity dodgeball event. Last year’s third annual event had 200 participants, 650 spectators, and raised over $74,000 ($171,000 3-year total) for St. Michael’s. This year will feature 18-24 teams of 10 dodgers, round robin tournament followed by playoffs, prizes for the winning team and best dressed team, DJs, silent auction, and Steam Whistle on tap. Donate $10 and you get a ticket; donate $20+ and you get a ticket and a tax receipt.

7 pm Super Magical Rainbow Love @ Magic Pony, 680 Queen St. W. Join magic makers Clara Venice and Shawna Lane in Dream Valley as they cast spells of love songs and rainbows. Clara is a Toronto-based musician who combines her divine voice with extensive instrumental talents to create exquisite one-woman performances. Doors open at 7 pm for Dream Valley cocktail hour, so come early to mingle in magic. Accompanying Clara’s concert will be hairstylist extraordinaire Shawna Lane of Toronto’s Brennan Demelo Studio, who will be giving attendees colourful and graphic hair stencils.

7 pm Thieves Pop-Up Mid-Show Party @ The Mascot, 1267 Queen St. W. Pop-up shop featuring the stylish Thieves collection plus beautiful, artistic floral installations by Shareen Ally. Until 11 pm. Pop-up is open from 10 am to 7 pm daily until September 22nd.

10 pm The Quiet Storm @ The Red Light, 1185 Dundas St. W. DJ Andycapp plays four hours of melodically soulful music that provides an intimate, laid-back mood tailor-made for late-night listening and a welcome end to the stresses of the workday.

10 pm Fortuna’s Disco Dungeon @ 751, 751 Queen St. W. For those of you who like their music hot, saucy, and meaty. Boogie-on-down to the Disco Dungeon! Live set at midnight.

10 pm Bass & Titties / Stop Crying @ Crawford, 718 College St. Upstairs, the Eff Emm Ell DJs play booty-shaking east coast, krunk, and rude boi classics + giveaways from The Baitshop. Downstairs, the Bass6 play hip-hop, reggae, and dance music to keep you happy. $5.

11 pm Legowelt & Footprintz @ The Drake Underground, 1150 Queen St. W. Legowelt (a.k.a. Danny Wolfers; Netherlands) describes his musical style as “a hybrid form of slam jack combined with deep Chicago house, romantic ghetto technofunk and EuroHorror Soundtrack.” Joining him will be Footprintz (Montreal), local Brandon Oliver, and the Neighbourhood Watch crew. $10.

FRIDAY

9 pm S.S. Songs: The Smiths @ The Riverboard Gambler, 261 Queens Quay E. Andy Rourke of The Smiths (a.k.a. one of the most legendary and influential rock n’ roll bands of all-time) is DJing on a boat! Also featuring live performances in the ship’s dining hall by Dwayne Gretzky, July Talk, and Stella Ella Ola. As always, Bobby Kimberley will be picking the jams before and after. $15 advance tickets available at Rotate This, Soundscapes, and online. BYOLifeJacket.

9 pm Peaches Does The Drake @ The Drake Hotel, 1150 Queen St. W. The renowned gender bending performance artist and electro punk provocateur returns to Toronto to celebrate the international premiere of her first feature film Peaches Does Herself at TIFF. The performance will include a host of collaborators with shows throughout the building, including a special laser harp performance on the Raised Lounge, appearances by comedian Sandy Kane, post rock band the Jolly Goods in the Underground, transgender performance artist Dani Daniels in Room 222 and so much more. 4 AM LAST CALL. $10.

9 pm Splattermonkey’s 10-year Anniversary/Birthday Celebration @ No One Writes To The Colonel, 460 College St. Help DJ Splattermonkey celebrate his birthday and the 10-year anniversary of his DJ career! He’ll be spinning some sweet sweet soulful ska, reggae, funk, disco, hip-hop, R&B, and  northern soul!

10 pm 90s Party: Back to Bayside @ The Annex WreckRoom, 794 Bathurst St. 90s Party is going back to Bayside High and throwing a radical Bayside Pep Rally to show those jerks from Sweet Valley High that they’re the school with the most heart! Come in your best 90s wear or dress as a 90s character or celebrity (think Saved by the Bell, 90210, Fresh Prince, Wayne’s World, Full House, House Party, Married with Children, or every Clueless outfit ever). Free Bayside Tigers Shirts for the first 50 people, surprise spotlight slow dances, $1 vodka jello shots ALL NIGHT LONG, 90s-themed costume contest for cash ($200!) and drink prizes. With DJs Caff and Fawn BC. $5 before midnight, $10 after.

10 pm (ALT)Night: Tag! The White Party @ Margret, 2952 Dundas St. W. Wear a white t-shirt and get as many people to sign it as you can! DJ Dislexia plays whatever-the-fuck! Drink specials from 8 to 10 pm (drunk feet dance better).

10 pm White Girl @ The Shop under Parts & Labour, 1566 Queen St. W. Rap from 1993-2012 with DJs Patrick McGuire, Josh McIntyre, and ItsMattLangille. $5.

10 pm Dirty Talk @ Unlovable, 1415-B Dundas St. W. The Adult Fantasy Adventure™ with DJs Diana and Pammm. Intergalactic italo disco glitter n’ junx.

10 pm Movement @ The Garrison (front room), 1197 Dundas St. W. Psych, beat, Shangri La sounds, subway speed groove, 50’s/60’s/70’s/80’s all vinyl dace party with DJ Richie Volume and friends. 4 AM LAST CALL.

10 pm Phazed / She’s So Thirsty @ Crawford, 718 College St. Upstairs, old school meets new school hip-hop and R&B with DJ Amplified. Downstairs, DJ Grouch plays 90’s reggae, hip-hop, and more. $5 before midnight, more after.

10 pm Floored @ The Piston, 937 Bloor St. W. DJ Fathom and crew play hip-hop, funk, groove, and dance hits. Expect breakdancing!

10 pm Slowed @ Wrongbar, 1279 Queen St. W. Slo-mo tunes (115 BPM or less) with DJs ︻╦╤─ ƱZ ─╤╦︻, Torro Torro, Sabo, and Lucie Tic. 4 AM LAST CALL. $10 advance tickets available online. For reduced guestlist and table service, email allicia@ledewit.com.

10 pm Get By Fridays @ The Ossington, 61 Ossington Ave. DJ Mantis and Hajah Bug spin hip-hop, funk, soul, and reggae vibes on two turntables with very special guests.

10 pm The Old School Back 2 School Party @ 751, 751 Queen St. W. DJs D’eeznuts, Specs One, and Total Paranoia keep it old school with tunes circa 1999 and earlier. LL Cool J, Run-D.M.C, Grandmaster Flash & the Furious Five, A Tribe Called Quest, Salt N Pepa, DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince, Spice Girls, Hanson, Shaggy, Beastie Boys, Aqua, En Vogue, Brandy, Monica, Montell Jordan, TLC, Aaliyah, Nirvana, Red Hot Chili Peppers, The Smashing Pumpkins, Rage Against The Machine, Oasis, etc.

10:30 pm Her @ La Perla, 783 Queen St. W. Loop-HER Edition! DJs The Robotic Kid, Cozmic Cat, and Kevin Ritchie spin cinematic beats you’ll want to relive again and again and again. Hostess is Neolia. Special drink special before 11:30 pm. For line bypass, email set.her.free@gmail.com. $5.

SATURDAY

12 pm September Swap Party @ Beaver Hall Gallery, 29 McCaul St. Show up with all of your out-of-season and unwanted clothing, and leave with a fabulous new haul! All clothing, shoes, and other accessories (with the exception of socks & undies) that are clean and in good condition are welcome. Featuring on-site alterations available (by donation) and yummy refreshments. All leftover clothing will be donated to local charities. Admission (with at least 5 swap items) is $8. If you have nothing to swap but still want to upgrade your wardrobe, just show up with an extra $5, and they’ll give you a bag to fill.

10 pm Strictly Business @ The Red Light, 1185 Dundas St. W. DJs Serious and Numeric present another classic hip-hop schooling session! Golden age super jams from A Tribe Called Quest, De La Soul, Black Moon, Mobb Deep, Notorious B.I.G., MC Lyte, Cypress Hill, Funkdoobiest, Gang Starr, Pete Rock & CL Smooth, Snoop Dogg, Dr. Dre, and much much more!

10 pm Bitch Craft @ The Shop under Parts & Labour, 1566 Queen St. W. DJs Blonde & Redhead play LOUD RAP MUSIC. Free before 11 pm, $5 after.

10 pm A Club Called Rhonda @ Wrongbar, 1279 Queen St. W. DJ sets by Azari & III, Goddollars, and Wheelwells. Hosted by Fritz Helder and Gregory Alexander. 4 AM LAST CALL. For guestlist requests, email guestlist@wrongbar.com.

10 pm Disco! @ The Piston, 937 Bloor St. W. A Digital Needle DJs keep you stayin’ alive with music of the disco genre.

10 pm Shake, Rattle & Roll @ Clinton’s, 693 Bloor St. W. Spend the night together with the Bangs & Blush ladies! 60’s pop, soul and rock n’ roll to drink, dance, and get messy to. $5.

10 pm Sadistic Glam ’94 @ The White House Studio Project, 277.5 Augusta Ave. “Sadistic Glam ’94 is a sardonic investigation of ruin and redundancy, uncovered through photographs, footage from bootleg VHS tapes, shoot interviews and cheap souvenirs. Evidence of real pain and personal tragedy are documented and arranged to present an alternate perspective on celebrity and spectacle framed by the legacy of professional wrestling.” Performances by Caiiro Foster and Sailboats Are White. $5.

10 pm Clockwork & Oliver Twizt @ The Hoxton, 69 Bathurst St. TIFF’s  closing Saturday party with headliners Clockwork (LA) and Oliver Twizt (Netherlands) + support from eMDy and Trivedi. 4AM LAST CALL. $15 tickets available at Rotate This, Soundscapes, Play De Record, and online.

10 pm Least Squares @ Bambi’s, 1265 Dundas St. W. Seeking chemistry? Dial 1-900-LST-SQURE for meaningful 1-on-1 connections, x-files house, italo drip, and brute-force disco romance. Brandon Oliver, Andrew Wilson, and special guest Brendon Duvall play the hits.

10 pm All Souled Out @ The Ossington, 61 Ossington Ave. DJs Big Jimmy Mills and Sylvermayne play hip-hop, funk, soul, R&B, make-you-wanna-boogie dance party music.

10 pm Flexin @ Crawford, 718 College St. Electro meets rap (90’s music videos galore!) with DJ F’House. Free Devil’s Cut 90 proof whiskey shots. $5 before midnight, more after.

11 pm Evening Standard @ The Drake Underground, 1150 Queen St. W. DJs Members Only and guest Mark E (UK) spin everything from disco renaissance to house classics. $10.

SUNDAY

9:30 pm Crosswires #30 @ The Garrison, 1197 Dundas St. W. A Sunday night series brought to you by Doc Pickles, co-founder and emcee of Wavelength. Featuring performances by Rep by Pop, Mango Angle, and ATTAGIRL + General Chaos Visuals and DJ selector Acacia Christensen. Sponsored by Steam Whistle. PWYC.

~ Caitlyn Holroyd

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