My friends party hard. They drink like recently divorced single ladies and say yes to basically every invite, because they fear that they’ll miss out on an opportunity, whether that means a new friend or an experience unlike any other. Even if they’ve been awake for 48 hours, if there’s an event they want to be at, then yes – they’ll be there simply because they FOMO—like, hard.
But that’s not me. Don’t get me wrong, I love to drink beer and mix it with alcohol I shouldn’t because it gets me drunk faster and I have more fun that way. I also love to stay up late, make bad decisions and meet people I find interesting or extremely attractive. But there’s also times, lately more so than ever, when I would much rather stay in my bed, eat yogurt and paint my nails. I might even read Lydia Davis and write a little, or paint. Call it productive laziness.
So forget about FOMO, I’m talking about JOMO. It’s defined as the joy of missing out on spending money I don’t have to buy alcohol or drugs, then spending more money to feed my hangover, which can only be cured by a $12 burrito from Chipotle the day after. (Extra guacamole, yes please!) But how come more people experience FOMO than JOMO? It’s just not right. That’s why I’m here to introduce you to a new way of life: a life filled with extra hours of sleep, money saved, and a motto that will help you enjoy your time alone, without the fear of wondering what other people are doing. Because seriously, who cares?
So take it from me, stop feeling FOMO, and get JOMO girl. Here’s how:
“I feel tired. Should I go out or stay in?”
This is the first step. The decisions you’ll live in tomorrow morning. My advice is ask yourself: is this a special event, something you’ll sincerely regret not going to tomorrow? Or is it a repeat of last Thursday? An afternoon at the Dog and Bear, followed by a million Bone Shakers and a headache that makes you wish you were born a pillow, so you could stay in bed and lay still all day? Yeah, think that one through for a second.
“But If I don’t go out, what should I do?”
Some people are afraid to be bored. If they don’t have Netflix, or aren’t checking their phones every second, scrolling Instagram or Twitter, they feel weird. The kind of weird that makes you feel like you need to be doing something, but don’t know what. Stay calm, this is what you can do for starters:
- What are your hobbies? Do you paint or draw? Ever tried writing? Maybe you enjoy running or doing yoga? What about bird watching? How about starting a new project, like a food blog or Instagram? Get to it!
- TREAT YO’SELF: When was the last time you actually had time to paint your nails and wait for them to dry? Better question – when was the last time you washed your hair? Try a Damage Remedy hair masque and let it sit for 30 minutes, put on a face masque and really clean up those nail beds. Pampering time is time for you. Nobody else.
- If you’re finished scrolling Instagram and Twitter, go to SheDoestheCity and read some life advice, it’s good shit! [Ed. note: we’re blushing!]
- Netflix therapy is a thing. Binge watch Julia Roberts or Matt Damon until your eyes fall out and you pass out with a bowl of cereal by your bed. It feels better than it sounds.
- Write a list of stuff you want to do. Writing things down makes life feel organized, and will help you remember what’s important. Start simple, like what you need to buy at the grocery store, or what your goals are this week at work. Maybe you need to make some phone calls—people forget things you know? Write it down and truly enjoy the JOMO to its fullest.
Is JOMO really better than FOMO?
In the miserable T.O winter, yes it truly is. You don’t always have to stay in and miss out on things, but it’s important to get to a place where you can enjoy spending time alone and not feel bad about it. When you stop caring about all the things your friends are doing, you can start to think about what you actually want to be doing instead. Go on girl, be a little selfish! Do the stuff you wish you had more time to do.
Now you can fully embrace the joy of missing out. Feels good, doesn’t it?