As far as reality shows go, The Bachelor franchise is my raison d’etre. I’ve been spending my Monday nights curled up with wine and a decent amount of snark while watching rose ceremonies and hot tub hookups since the Andrew Firestone days (that’s Bachelor speak for a pretty long effing time).

I’ve tweeted about the show; I’ve written about it. Heck, I even applied for the initial Canadian spin-off – with tongue-firmly-in-cheek, mind you. (Okay, I admit if I had been chosen, I would have probably gone. Wine-induced tears have always been kind of my thing).

So, you can imagine my excitement when I snagged a pass to Eligible Magazine’s fourth annual TIFF Bachelor Party on the weekend. Bachelor favourites Chris Bukowski, Jared Haibon, Tenley Molzahn, and Mikey Tenerelli were mingling with guests at Everleigh nightclub. Michael Stagliano was there too (but in my humble fan opinion, his ten minutes of fame are almost up).

Admittedly, I’m not one to get pumped up over meeting celebrities, no matter where they rank on the A-D list. (Case in point: I once met Paul-freaking-Newman and was cool as a cucumber robot). I don’t seek out autographs and I definitely don’t take selfies, but I was curious about meeting these photogenic faces that graced my TV for a few franchises, and then some (that’s a Bukowski nod for non-viewers). So off I went to the VIP meet-and-greet in three-inch heels that I don’t normally wear and a satin jumpsuit that, much to my chagrin, would be deemed a “onesie” by a few partygoers at night’s end.

Right off the bat, my plus one was able to score a one-on-one with Jared. He was sitting in a designated booth that would serve as a sort of “time out” for VIPs throughout the evening whenever the crowd got too “cozy” (read: intense as hell). It turns out that Jared, who’s been compared to Ashton Kutcher by Mila Kunis herself, was hoping to meet someone special during his stint on Bachelor Paradise. He said he thought he would be leaving with someone by the end of it. (Interesting tidbit: earlier in the day, Jared told Flare that he had hoped Britt would show up on Paradise). But, as viewers know, he left only with the remnants of Ashley I.’s heart and snot. Poor guy.

I asked if the presence of the camera was “weird” whenever they were attempting to have intimate conversations with each other. Jared said, “You get used to it,” and then Michael interrupted that “making out helps with that too.” (I bet.) It seemed the two bros wanted some time alone, so we moved onto Mikey, who was deep in conversation with two middle-aged women. After giving them a few minutes together, I finally uttered the words I’ve been secretly dying to say: Can I steal him for a second?

Mikey and I shared a knowing laugh over that corny move. I asked him if he’d been to Toronto before (he hadn’t, but “loved it”) and then I asked if, during those infamous dinner conversations, contestants discussed more than just the boring “How many kids do you want?” and “What are your thoughts on marriage?” He said they definitely do, but it’s edited to focus on those same old questions time and again.

Next, we found Chris, who was a lot more affable, attractive, and way less intoxicated IRL than I thought he would be. He talked about his restaurants – upscale sports bars – with a new location opening in Washington D.C. I asked if his image of being a carouser bothered him, but he shrugged and said, “That’s what we sign up for.” He also mentioned how much he liked Toronto, and he even asked my friend if he’d seen her before (we’re still not sure if this was a pick-up move or not, but it was a pretty slick ice breaker).

Later on, we waited in a queue to meet and take a pic with Tenley like she was some sort of a Disney character. Oh wait – she actually was. But now I definitely know why: the woman is sweet as can be. She was the epitome of patience and grace despite the fact that there was a reported “Single White Female-type” fan that was eerily possessive of her. Eventually, I found my way to the bubbly nutritionist who told me she was so honoured to be the first female Bachelor star at the TIFF Bachelor Party, and that she loved Canada and has visited our fair country numerous times (she’s even been to Saskatchewan!) We were literally pushed away by the sheer volume of Tenley fans, so my friend and I decided to find Jared one last time.

Ah, Jared. To no surprise of Bachelor fans, the fuzzy-faced Rhode Island native was easily the most popular one that night. Fans surrounded him, eager for a hug and a smile from the toothy hunk. Lining up to take a photo with him felt like lining up to see Santa at the mall. It was somewhat disturbing. My friend and I decided to take matters into our own hands and sneak a selfie snap with Jared in the background, but we were quickly found out by the J-man himself. However, he was gracious and asked us if we wanted a picture. We did! And then just like that, my night of rubbing elbows and snapping pics with the Bachelors was complete, and I went to bed with visions of roses and Chris Harrison dancing in my head.

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