We caught up with Dan Levy and Jessi Cruickshank who are hosting the casts of THE HILLS and THE CITY for a two-and-a-half hour extravaganza live from NYC, beginning at 9 p.m. E.T tonight.

The last person Jessi wants to go for dinner with is boring Whitney Port and Dan does not like Enzo the child. This and other emergency goss before The After Show:

SDTC: What’s happening? Give us some dirt!!!

JESSI: We just came from a meeting at MTV where we were informed that we still don’t know if Erin and Olivia will be coming out on the show together tonight.
DAN: When it comes to these events – people have to be separated and no one really knows if they’re going to talk to each other.

SDTC: What’s the deal, does Olivia just not pull clothes on purpose?
JESSI: I think she just comes from a very privileged background and she’s not used to doing manual labour.

SDTC: Although we enjoy her angry sideways smirk, is Erin overreacting? Or is Olivia really that bad at her job?
DAN: I think it would be very hard to work with Olivia. Obviously Erin has a grudge but at the same time – Olivia is a very confident person – and I don’t know if she has the work ethic to warrant that confidence.

SDTC: On to more important things – who – out of all these vapid reality stars – would you want to go on a road trip with?
JESSI: Roxy. She’s the opposite of Whitney. When they went to the Hamptons this season – Whitney was in the front seat being nice and quiet and Roxy had her head out the roof doing that scene from Boys on the Side.
DAN: Going to Vegas with Kristin Cavallari seems like a pretty fun idea. Who knows what could happen??!!

SDTC: Do you prefer Kristin as a protagonist to LC?
DAN: Lauren was ready to call it quits and Kristin came into the show with no inhibitions and really didn’t give a shit about the cameras. She was there to stir things up and for our show – that’s what we love.
JESSI: We were a little bit nervous that the show would turn into a bit of a Jerry Springer type thing. .

SDTC: She does like strippers and sex.
JESSI: Tonight you will see – there is some serious making out happening. I don’t think we ever even saw Lauren kiss. It’s been refreshing with Kristin – I prefer Kristin.
SDTC: Why do all the boys like her so?
DAN: Because she’s fun. She’s a strong-minded woman – and you either take it or leave it. That’s an appealing thing for guys – cause they always love the chase and that’s what it’s about with Kristin.

SDTC: What about poor Audrina?
DAN: Audrina has unfortunately been whittled down to an emotional mouth …she’s a bit of a broken lady at this point.

SDTC: What do you think about little Enzo?
DAN: I don’t care about the kid. I don’t like precocious kids who are really self-aware of the fact that they are cute. They say witty one-liners to get a reaction. I’m not a kid person.

SDTC: Jessi, what are your thoughts on Heidi and Spencer – have they gone off the deep end completely?
JESSI: They are a whole different brand of human being. Their existence on this planet is to become famous and they will stop at nothing to achieve that goal.
DAN: The more we talk to them the more people have to hear their names, the more they become famous. The joke is on us. It’s a strange vehicle that they’ve created …I find them a bit boring.

SDTC: Switching gears – are you scared of Kelly Cutrone? Is she a good mentor?
JESSI: She’s tough. I would not want to work with her because I’m way too sensitive. I would break down into tears. But I think she genuinely looks out for Whitney. She is a raging bitch – but at the end of the day she’s a really smart and successful woman. She is a good mentor.

SDTC: Do you think Whitney will succeed with her design line?
JESSI: I hope that  she has success with her clothing line. I don’t think she’ll still be a reality star in five years. In terms of giving Dan and I a lot of material to work with – she hasn’t been so fruitful this season.

SDTC: Is she so boring that you wouldn’t want to go for dinner with her?
JESSI: I’ve seen her on those dates..she doesn’t say much. I would do anything for a candlelight dinner with Brody.

SDTC: Who do you think he’s going to pick? Kristin or Jayde?
JESSI: One playboy playmate and one hot television star…he’s caused some trouble for himself. He’s coming out for the cast confessions pre-show and we are hoping to get him to be straight up with us for once.

SDTC: The show is going to be nuts tonight.
DAN: I’m anxious.

SDTC: How do you come down off the insanity?
DAN: Cut to me eating two bagels and cream cheese tomorrow on a bench somewhere.

Catch the insanity tonight!!

For past episodes: www.mtv.ca