From the moron who brought us such arguments as “rape should be decriminalized because it’s a valuable learning experience” and Roosh’s (Country Name Here) Compendium series (known in most literate circles as “The Misogynists Guide to Attempting to Get Laid in Various Geographic Locales”), we bring you the latest in outrageous chauvinism:
Women with short hair are lesser than.
Roosh V., a self-proclaimed pick-up artist & self-published author, has stirred up controversy yet again with his latest tirade, Long Hair In Women Correlates to Beauty, Fertility and Health.
Although it doesn’t expressly say so in the title, the post suggests that the length of a woman’s hair somehow establishes her worth, and further concludes that all women who have chosen to take the leap and lop it all off are indisputably “deluded” because of it.
Not only does short hair make women ugly, sickly, barren, and unstable, it also puts women in danger! According to Roosh, the act of cutting one’s hair, as a woman, is actually an act of self-harm:
“A woman cutting off healthy hair is one step away from [the] literal cutting of her skin with a sharp object, because both behaviors denote a likely mental illness where the woman presents herself to society as more damaged than her genetic condition would indicate, suggesting that she has suffered environmental damage that has reduced her overall fitness. She must be monitored by state authorities so she doesn’t continue to hurt herself.”
As a woman who has proudly worn her hair short since 2009, I have to say I’m a bit befuddled by this assertion. Mostly because I know that, even with my haircut, I’m still relatively attractive, free of most contagious diseases, and capable of reproduction, should the human race ever depend on my uterus to save mankind. As for my psychological state, the amount of shampoo I’m required to use while washing my hair does not make a case for or against my mental health. Some might argue that I’m charmingly irrational (my words, not theirs) but my locks are not the cause, nor are they the result of any defective (I call it creative) thinking.
So why did I choose to cut my hair off six years ago? For one, I like the look of short hair. I think it’s both powerful and pretty at once, like an electrical storm, or a wild horse running on the beach, or a GIF of just Beyonce’s thighs. Another reason is that my hair is extremely curly, making it tough to brush, and even tougher so when it’s long. Cutting it short allowed me to shorten my morning routine in turn, freeing up more minutes to do important things, like scour the internet for sexist blog posts to get worked up over. And finally, I cut my hair short because I can. Because today, women do not have to look or dress a certain way in order to appeal to their male counterparts. Or female counterparts. We don’t need to wear skirts to be feminine, lighten our hair or our skin to appear less ethnic, live off of chewing gum and Obetrol just to weigh less, or stay at home with the children in order to be deemed fit to have children at all.
Rather than self-harm, I believe a short cut is a symbol of self-acceptance. I hid under a lot of hair for a lot of years, for a lot of stupid reasons. Finally, I decided that the time it took to blow dry my bangs in a way that concealed my exam-induced blemishes could have been better spent. I concluded that self-love wouldn’t be found at the bottom of an overpriced leave-in conditioner bottle. I learned that hair, like self-esteem, can always grow back in time, no matter how badly it’s been butchered.
As far as my hair is concerned, and really anything else in my life, I believe the only way I can hurt myself is by letting others influence my choices. If I think my hair looks nice short, if I feel more comfortable, or more ‘myself’ with a pixie or a pageboy, I’m not about to let some guy tell me I’m crazy because of it.
If you’ve ever allowed a prescribed standard of femininity to inform your looks, or your life, I’d suggest that you take a moment to think about the types of people, places, and things, that perpetuate these norms. And then do whatever the fuck you want anyway.