grown-ass-womans-guide

You’re a grown-ass woman and you’re happily dating a grown-ass man or woman. It’s nice. They cook for you sometimes and you’ve never felt more chill about your leg hair. But what do you call them?? As discussed, you are both deeply grown-ass, and therefore boyfriend/girlfriend feels a bit Degrassi. They’ve moved on from being… Read More »

You’re a Grown-Ass Woman, so let me ask you this: has your body been acting…sneaky lately? Mine is. Hormonal changes are skulking around in the night, bumping into rogue hairs doing that Pink Panther creeping move, elbows and knees bouncing up and down to comedy sneaking music. My breath is being shifty, having quietly developed… Read More »

You’re a Grown-Ass Woman. So why are you reading this at 4am on a worknight? You said you would go to the gym tomorrow morning. The truth is, despite sleep being scientifically the best thing in the world (“Zzzzzzzzz” – scientists), most of us seem to just plain hate it! Or so you’d think from the amount of time… Read More »

I’m having a yard sale this week. This Sunday, to be specific. It is happening at 456 Roxton Rd., from noon til.. whenever, I guess, and you’re all invited to come and pick through my belongings and haggle with me over how much the bandage dress (!?) that I purchased (?!!!) in 2008 (!!!) is worth now. It’s… Read More »

You’re a grown-ass woman, and regardless of the actual size of your ass, it is very likely that people have talked to you about it. Just like, on the street, or at parties, or at the gym. Just wherever. You’ve got a bod, and members of our society at large have things to say about… Read More »

You’re a grown-ass woman, but that doesn’t mean that a proper, official Buddies Road Trip will ever stop making you feel like a 16-year-old who just got her license and can’t belieeeeeeve her parents are going to let her have the car OVERNIGHT. Road trips are one of the great joys of summer (when Lear-style tempests… Read More »