We’ve all been there: hopelessly digging through Craigslist ads and blasting our Facebook with “HELP ME FIND A HOME” please. It’s the first thing you think about when you wake up and the first thing you bring up on your Tinder date.
“You look nice,” he smiles.
“DO YOU KNOW ANYONE MOVING OUT OF A TWO BEDROOM?” you respond.
You rush out of work to go see an apartment the size of your hand and have so many phone numbers in your call history that you don’t even know which landlord you just made an appointment with.
It’s stressful and draining and the most discouraging thing ever because, let’s be honest, this city is full of crap apartments. So to save us all future headaches, let’s just point out a few things about house hunting in the 6 that we can all agree on:
“Cozy” = tiny as shit
Bring your bed, a couple of mugs and a toothbrush. Everything else is up for sale.
“Spacious” = a wee bit bigger
You can bring your dresser to this one and maybe even your bookshelf (if you get really creative).
“BEAUTIFUL HOME IN A BEAUTIFUL NEIGHBOURHOOD!” = North York
And North York = No thank you
“TONS OF STORAGE!”
You get your own closet AND there’s a cupboard over the washing machine. BOOM, BABY!
“Steps away from TTC, great restaurants and shopping!”
Because apparently the Dufferin mall is the shopping hot bed of the city. Next.
It sounds too good to be true?
It sounds too bad to be true?
“Perfect for students!”
Dirty. Gross. Never. But close to U of T.
Costs $1000 to live in a pit the size of your childhood bedroom?
Costs $900 to live in the pit the size of your childhood bedroom?
THIS PLACE IS SO CHEAP AND PERFECT. After all, you’ve always been a fan of being cozy.
“You won’t see another offer like this!”
But you will. We all will. Because it’s the same story every time: weeding through the deceptive photos and thinking you’re seeing a goldmine that turns out to be a dump. Calling and emailing and mentally picturing where all of your shit is going to go. Crying to your financial advisor because every time you move you somehow need a million things and you JUST CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE.
But in the end, you find a gem. ViewIt turned out to be a-ok, or perhaps your Tinder date pulled through. Regardless, you found a home. Moving will suck but then you’ll LIVE there and it will have all been worth it because as much as we all complain about the transit and the rent and the $9 pints and the HOV lanes, WE LOVE YOU TORONTO.
You just might be too good to be true.