Bathing suit shopping is not a dream. Even for those of us who can fit into off-the-rack suits, there’s still the matter of finding one we like in our size, taking it into a cramped, poorly lit changeroom, and maybe, possibly, being confronted with one of the true horrors of Western 21st century life: a store changeroom that requires you to LEAVE IT to look in the mirror. To just… go outside. Where the clothed people are. In a bathing suit you’re not even sure you’re going to purchase, worn over top of your bunched up underwear. Sartre was wrong about “other people”: this is Hell.

Which is why I was so excited to discover Surania, a Spanish company that lets you DESIGN YOUR OWN BATHING SUIT AND THEN MAKES IT FOR YOU BASED ON YOUR MEASUREMENTS LIKE SOME KIND OF FANCY QUEEN. For $103 (incl. shipping and handling!), I designed the lil beauty you see above, then input my measurements and within a week and a half had a knock on my door with the suit! It felt so good to put something on that I knew immediately would a) fit perfectly (it did) and b) like the look of (I better, I picked it out!). Plus now I won’t have to pretend I “didn’t realize” I had switched the 10 top with the 12 bottoms when I get called out by the Cheap Bikinis R US employee for swapping sizes on the DL to accommodate my butt.

It’s hard to feel great in a bathing suit. There is a lot of bullshit out there about “bikini bodies.” Every time we buy groceries there’s a phalanx of magazines shaming famous women—women with leisure time and personal trainers and chefs, sure, but also with babies and jobs and high-pressure, highly-scrutinized lives—for “letting themselves go” or “baring cellulite on the beach” or “walking around being themselves, how dare they.” It’s hard! The last time I felt truly comfortable in a bikini I was 17. It was more relieving than I’d expected to have this reasonably priced, low-stress way to get a quality bathing suit in time for summer.

But it’s not just for people who’ve historically had a tough time buying bathers—although srsly, hallelujah, for us the day has come—t’s also just omgsoooo fun to design your own suits! There are so many types of tops and bottoms and fabrics and colours and cuts. AND they also do lingerie. AND they’re expanding into men’s swimwear soon. Basically, from now on you should picture me like Scarlett O’Hara in a high-waisted two-piece, standing outside the burning remnants of a mall, shouting: As God is my witness, I’ll NEVER leave the stall to check out my crappy bathing suit AGAIN! #blessed

Check out Surania.com to make your own one piece, bikini, or singular top/bottom.