The early days of summer turn me into a bit of a Spendy McGee. “Another pitcher of sangria for the table, please! What are patios for?” “Why yes, I’d love to attend your wedding, distant friend I have lost touch with! Would be happy to purchase you many gifts and also buy myself a bus ticket out to Windsor for the evening! WH NOT?!” “Look, I just need this dress and I don’t care that it’s not on sale, we’re meant for each other. It’s so summer-y!” You get it. Once July hits, I start to realize this summer guy is sticking around and my money is not. Sunburnt and broke, I try to reassess, and usually end up starting between three and nine hare-brained schemes to try to save and/or make more cash before the month’s end. Here’s what I did this week.

  1. Instituted a Two Wear policy on shirts before washing, and basically an Infinite Wear policy on skirts and pants. This does not apply to work out clothes. REPEAT: does NOT apply to work out clothes. (I do nude yoga.)
  2. Discovered that literally anything in one’s fridge can be turned into either a pasta dish or a “green smoothie.” Some successful combinations have included key-lime kale smoothies and “just margarine” pasta, the eight-year-old’s classic.
  3. Pencilled in some summer nights with this list of free outdoor movies in Toronto this summer. Josie and the Pussycats, I am coming for you with a bottle of wine and another bottle of 40-proof nostalgia.
  4. Attempted to set up a Gertrude Stein-style salon of rotating artist friends in my home by luring them there with promises of key-lime kale smoothies, therefore never leaving the house and having to apply costly sunscreen or pay for the TTC.
  5. Found out I can pay student fare on the TTC still, at age 25. Felt alternately good about my skin care regimen and bad about ripping off an underfunded public service. 
  6. Agreed to go to free yoga in the park (fully clothed) (#sacrifices) at 10am on a damn Sunday. Physical activity outdoors beforenoon on a Sunday. I am basically a martyr for the cause of budgets.
  7.  Unable to afford a bikini wax, I downstairs Nair-ed. It was extremely stressful. Things got out of hand, symmetry-wise, and I ended up with an accidental Nair-zilian and now I’m cold when I wear skirts. 
  8. Didn’t really go out much, and kind of liked it. I’m a lil’ sober hermit these days (terrible thundy-storms have helped this seem less lame to both my friends and myself) and it’s making me feel productive, centered, and healthy. Plus, $$$$! We did it! We’re doing it!