In which the intrepid MemeMachine offers a discerning selection of what’s buzzing on the internet. Bringing you crucial knowledge that you were presumably too busy to pull from the internet because you were off enjoying the outside world IRL. This is procrastination at its finest. You’re welcome.

Good day, all. Let’s start this week’s smattering of fun things extracted from the Information Autobahn with (duh!) a cat video. Baby kitten dreams a baby kitten nightmare and momma cat HUGS THE BAD DREAMS AWAY. Also, this just happened.

More! Adorable! Things! All you need to know about the Fluffington Post is that it exists. 

If you’re looking for a reason to not love Jason Schwartzman, you won’t find it here.

And from Sesame Street to Wall Street, Occupy protesters hit quite the turbulence last week when campus police at UC Davis pepper sprayed peaceful student protesters. As these things go, the photo has skyrocketed into meme-status. Behold, Casual Pepper Spray Cop does a walk of #shame through art history. Well played, internet.

Tumblr: Babies that look like Rob Ford. Personally, I’m just not seeing the resemblance, even though this one kind of looks like Doug. Still, a chubby baby is a chubby baby is a chubby baby, and a chance to make fun of the mayor is…well, you get it.

Great idea, U.S. department store Kohl’s. Take the most vile, repugnant, cheese grater-on-nerves song to ever grace YouTube, force an additional syllable in the chorus and COVER IT for a Black Friday ADVERTISEMENT. I want to track down the Kohl’s marketing team, vigorously shake them by the shoulders and individually beg them to re-evaluate their places in society. Ugh. #Life.

Twitter account to follow of the week: @Queen_UK. A very, very fake Queen Elizabeth twitter account that tweets primarily about gin. She who works a desk job be warned: with the time difference, Queenie’s end of day Gin O’Clock tweets clock in around 1 p.m. and it always seems like a good idea at the time.

-Elli Stuhler
@ellistuhler