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March 26, 2009

Ohhhhh Diary, I’m SORRY!

It’s been, well, far too long since I last wrote. Sure, I’d been pretty down the last time, and ya, having a man now has been occupying my time. Still, no excuse.

Let me try and catch you up. I’ll start with The Big Guy. Yup, I’m talking about G-O-D. As you know, The Boyfriend is religious. In fact, he’s kind of a Super-Catholic. One Sunday, I finally decided to get up early with him and go to Chruch. Yup, this lapsed Catholic finally ventured to service for the first time in YEARS for something other than a funeral. I even ended up going to confession. “Bless me Father for I have sinned, my last confession was…twelve years ago, and these are my sins. So, Father, what exactly should I say now, it’s been a while, so do I just tell you EVERYTHING?”, I asked, fearing years of sex, drugs and rock and roll were going to have to be told to a man of God. “Just tell me ONE thing you’ve done that really bothers you,” he said…thank God. I skipped over the sex acts, and my Penance was only one Our Father. I got off easy.

I was actually surprised how well I remembered everything from Church. The hymns, the responses, the prayers. I guess fourteen years of going every Sunday really engrains that stuff in a person. Now, it wasn’t like I was going to Church with Boyfriend because I felt like I needed some kind of redemption. I just thought it would be interesting to go back, and maybe help me understand a bit more why this is so important for him, help us “bond” or something. Plus, I have to admit, I’d been dying to get a peak at his ex, who I knows also goes every Sunday. After receiving Communion, I got a glimpse, as she playfully grabbed his leg when we walked by. Bitch. (Oops, that wasn’t very Christian of me)

Honestly though, I kind of have a hate-on for this woman. They’ve been broken up for years, and he talks about her as if he almost hates her, yet she’s still in his life. Calling him when we’re in bed, asking him to return movies for her, taking him out for brunch. Don’t get me wrong, I was just in a hot tub with my ex a couple of weeks ago. Difference is, we’re still good friends, I don’t hate him in the least. Why would you spend time with someone who hurt you and you don’t like… unless your dislike is just a cover? Well, at least that’s what I was thinking, and I told him just that. He assures me there’s nothing more to it, but after going to see “He’s Just Not That Into You”, I still was a bit suspicious. In fact, that movie keeps popping into my head every time a girlfriend tells me about a guy who’s still not ready to commit, who’s still on POF, or isn’t calling.

To his credit, though, the Boyfriend quickly passed one of the movie/book’s many theories on a date, showing that if he’s “into you”, he’ll make sure he gets to see you. B/F came down to meet me at a bar where I was seeing a friend bartend. I realized half way through the night that he was sick as a dog, but came anyway. Very sweet. There have been many sweet moments since – three months worth, in fact. He helped make dinner for all my friends for my 26th B-Day party recently, he made an adorable Valentine last month, and he does everything a “good boyfriend” should – from playing with my hair, to carrying my purse while I shop. A few weeks ago, in the middle of making love (that seems weird – I’m so used to referring to it as “fucking”), I told him that I loved him. He said it back.

<3

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