Dear Diary,
So far, so good! I’ve been home from Portugal for a couple of weeks now, and I have yet to break my vow to abstain from sex until in a relationship. I have to admit, it hasn’t been easy. My commitment to this vow was put to the test my first weekend back. Buttercup and I went to Supermarket in Kensington to catch up. She had been traveling with me for the first stint of my two months traveling, and had yet to heard about my night of double pleasure with the Australian boys.

Shortly after getting to the bar I receive a text from a guy I hadn’t seen in quite a while – The Gentle Giant. We had dated over a yearago, and while he was good in the sack, there wasn’t much of a connection beyond that. “Welcome back traveler. What are you up to?” I texted him back my location, and he responded saying he was in the area and would stop by the bar to see me. When he got there, I have to admit, he was looking fine, but I knew I had to stick to my guns and not go home with him. Three hours later, I was in my bra and leggings on The Giant’s bed. There’s nothing wrong with some heavy petting. Despite the guy’s best attempts to get those tights off me, I wouldn’t budge. He realized it was a lost cause, and backed off. I did it!

A few months ago I probably would have gone from saying “let’s just kiss”, to “just oral”, to “just hurry up and fuck me”, so I know I can’t let my pants come off, or it’s too late. I want a boyfriend, and although I hate to admit it, as I’d always believed love could come out of a one night stand, but I’ve lost all faith in that statement. I need to hold out until I know he’s not just in it for the sex. I know I’ve done my fair share of using guys for only one thing…so I don’t blame any guys who’ve done that to me. But I want more than that. And I’ve been looking long enough, and STILL don’t have a boyfriend, so I think a change in strategy is the key.

This one guy I’d been seeing before I’d left for Europe, who I have a fairly long and twisted relationship with, was Blondie. While I’d been gone he’d send me random emails of how he awaited my return…purely for sex, unfortunately. When I’d finally emailed back saying that unless he was looking for something more, it was over, he basically picked “over”. Once I was home, he continued with the booty call requests, and he can be very persuasive. Still, so far, I’ve resisted.

This past weekend was my biggest test, although I don’t think I’ve nailed this “playing hard to get” routine just yet. I met a guy during the week through a short term job I was doing. First day working I’d though this one guy seemed pretty cute, although his sexual orientation was definitely being called to question. After three days of polite chit-chat, I finally got some good face-time in with him when we all went to Cadillac Lounge after work Friday night. As the evening progressed he asked if I’d like to come over to his condo to “listen to some music and drink some wine”. As we left the bar I whispered in my friend from work’s ear, “Definitely not gay”.

His place was amazing, and as we danced in the middle of his living room, he kissed me. Soon we were in the bedroom, and although, once again, my leggings remained on me at all times, the rest of my clothes quickly came off, as did his pants. I gave him head until we both passed out from all the drinking (and smoking) earlier. I woke up at 5am and quickly found my way to a cab. Maybe I should have woken him so I could have at least got his number, but I did find him on facebook the next day. When he accepted me, wouldn’t you know it… the two friends we have in common according to FB: The Gentle Giant and Blondie.