To Anna Dello Russo, couture week must hold the same thrill the Ikea catalogue does for the rest of us. The presentation is utterly pleasant, and everything is affordable – to her. It’s a great big parade of “hey look what I can do,” but for ADR it’s simply a preview to her next season of ridiculous (ridiculously awesome, that  is) outfits. Which, we might add, for most would be the kind of financial investment as buying a small apartment. For ADR, it’s an average Tuesday. 

But enough about ADR and more about the clothes! Couture week just wrapped up in Paris and while our invite must have gotten lost in the mail, we’ll still happily point out some of our favourite things we’ll never be wearing. 

#1 Elie Saab’s collection, as the folks at style.com point out, makes it easy to forget that this is the same designer that clothed Halle Berry the night she accepted her Academy Award. It was a simultaneous win for fashion and film – who could forget the shiraz-coloured gown where embroidered flowers covered her lady bits?  The whimsical tulle and organza bonanza of this year shows a shift in gears, but no less breath taking. We like this dress for its versatility – fun in the front, business in the back. A high-fashion mullet, if you will. I like to imagine if a super hero were on bridesmaid duty, the train could double as a cape were there a universe-threatening emergency and no time to change  into a spandex onesy. 

#2 Riccardo Tisci of Givenchy has been producing some wonderfully weird couture lately. May we remind you of last season’s skeletal collection, which would have been perfect, were the bride of Frankenstein into couture? Again, we applaud the shapes in the sheer fabric, though we can’t help but scratch our heads at the hats. Perhaps a tad loud for a Viking funeral, no?  

#3 Jean Paul Gaultier has been accused of having a dry spell, though I personally think he can do no wrong, even if he is recycling the punk-goes-high-fashion thing for the umpteenth time. Presumably, Sid Vicious has lost interest in turning over in his grave by now. Still, part punk, part red carpet worthy and part sci fi, this dress screams belle of the inter-planetary ball. If only we got invited to those. 

#4 For what it’s worth, this is a gorgeous dress that looks like it’s made of liquid. The hat, made by the wonderfully weird milliner Philip Treacy, however, is from a different realm. It brings back memories of Oddjob, Goldfinger’s evil Korean who can fling his hat hard enough to seriously damage a statue. With its aerodynamic build and seemingly razor sharp edges it could definitely be a similar weapon, though it could also double as a Frisbee or a cymbal.  

~ Elli Stuhler